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12:18 a.m. - 2010-10-22
I'll always be there right by your side no matter what
Its fukkin cold up here.. I still dont know why the heat in this place defies the natural laws but it does... ugh.

Ive got five blankets on my bed.. and its technically not winter yet!! the next three years are going to suckkk

Im going through my clutter in record speed. Which sounds better than it is, considering there wasn't any record before I started this endevour(sp) as I have NEVER gone through these boxes. Memory shit from gradeschool until high school, random boxes FULL of papers... bills from P's BMO loan, and a ton of shit that I dont care about..

I finally put all my ticket stubs in one place.. the last concert I went to was Leonard Cohen, and before that? Alanis in T.O.... yeah. Maybe in 9 years I can go out again.

You know whats a BIG trip? Listening to FM96, waiting for the 90s Nooner to come on, and hearing WINTERSLEEP !!

They played at Curry On, in the days when I was almost phobic and could hardly leave my apartment, and Josh would 'Make' me go out. Threaten me that he would come and drag me out, and then he would be late for the door shift and yeah lots of silliness..

Anyways. I downloaded a shittonne of Wintersleep now, but I cant stop listening to two of the songs... I was addicted to 'Orca' and 'Sore' when I was in that time period of doing nothing but working and comign home and going on this loverly site to catch up with all the other people I read every day.. update 52 times before finally crashing only to get up and go to work. On about three hours sleep.

My pants are either wearing out in awkward places or they are falling off me. WTH.. Its not like I have been doing anything remotely healthy lately.. and I didn't buy these pants all at the same time so why are they wearing out altogether??

Ugh. I have to decide whether I take the trip to London, spend horrid $$ on gas, and more on pants that will last me more than 6 months OR cheap out and have to buy pants again come New Years...

You know, I might take Tali with me to buy pants... I havent had someone with me to buy clothes in.. um.. TEN YEARS!

hhahahaahahahah oh god. I probably just can't remember..

Or rather, I was probably shopping with someone else, getting shit for them, and decided to buy some for me too. Thats more likely.
Who am I kidding? It's entirely possible I am forgetting some awesome day when I went out shopping. I doubt it though, since the last time I went actual shopping I bought a dress for my brother's wedding, and shoes. and I did that all alone. Because that's how I roll these days. Really once you hit 300lbs it doesnt fucking matter what you wear. Or what colour it is. It all looks hideous.

That's why I forget to look in the mirror before I leave. Luckily, FlyLady is going to help me sort that out too.

One thing at a time tho, my god. Clutter that endangers my children first. Clutter that endangers my heart second. At least I have ducks in a row-like thing. If you squint and tilt your head, it might be a row.

OH and just in case I forget:

I won ! heh.

Juli's crying again, I have to go rub her back for another 40 min, and pray to god she stays asleep this time...



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