5:03 p.m. - 2013-01-18
Of the 'problems with my ugly bits' variety of TMI.
Apparently my body thinks it's about 45 years older than it is, since after sorting out my kidney stone issues, now I'm dealing with hemorrhoid(s).
Awesome. Nothin like bleeding from the butt to wake you up in the morning..
After reviewing many options on the internets (honestly, after googling 'pelvic pain' nothing scares me anymore), I've decided that my case isn't that bad, it's just painful as fuck to have a bowel movement.. the obnoxious veins are contained internally and ache and whatever but they aren't bleeding at times when they have no reason to.... they just aren't all that happy right now.
So I'm doing the 'home remedy' thing, which means Im sitting on a pillow (that does help, surprisingly) and being careful about what I'm eating and shit.
I've also managed to get a couple of cuts/irritations in another unmentionable part.. so I've also been googling STDs. I don't have any symptoms.. so I s'pose I can just chalk that up to my immune system having issues and the fact that I'm drinking a shitton of water and peeing every 45 min and I buy really cheap TP.. so it's irritating me maybe?
Eh, whatever. I havent gotten curious enough to wrangle a mirror to try and see what's going on.. and, what the hell, if Patrick is feeling charitable I might get him to take a look.. and we may have to have a talk about unprotected sex and exactly how much of it he's had in the past two years.. because now I'm paranoid..
Not that I'm really one to talk, since that night back in Oct 2011, but still.. it was 2011, and nothing remotely weird has shown up until this week..
EH i'm over thinking what will mostly be an awkward as fuck conversation.. but considering anything but vaginal penetration hurts like a motherfucker, we're gonna have to have a conversation..
Because he's never satisfied with ~just~ that. Even though I totally am. We haven't reached the 'fold me up like a pretzel' and 'thirty two separate positions for 2.3 seconds each' stages yet.. hopefully he's mellowed in his porn viewing or has actually realized that real sex doesn't have to be like that?