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12:05 a.m. - 2020-01-07
They call them rogues they travel fast and alone
Im drowning in a fic i read... um feels like forever ago.... it was. i was sick and off work but it was the inbetween year before patrick and I melted down for good

and i mean, not that a fic can have that effect but I just wanted someone who cared you know? Someone that paid attention and actually believed me when i said something is terribly fucking wrong

A Derek to my Stiles, that's how it is, but the Stiles in that fic, not necessarily the Stiles from the show.

(Play Crack the Sky, in case you want to look the fic up on Ao3, or in case Im reading this at some future date and cant remember what fic im referencing, which is the more likely of any scenerio)

Im thinking a lot about my book lately. that horrible mess of unedited Nano bookness. I think it's better if I started over considering it's been ten fucking years, but i might be able to frankenstein some of the better parts

Started listening to Food is Food and Love is Love. Turns out it's a workbook, so i might have to get a physical copy instead..

Im still listening to Nathan Wagner while I sleep. and old eps of critical role.

the paint corner idea is falling apart a bit. Theres not enough air flow in my room to have it in here. i can paint sometimes, but to have a permanent painting place in the same room as where i sleep really isn't a great idea, unless i want to be literally huffing paint fumes all night erry night.

Also I wont stop? Like I will just get in the zone and not realize it's 4am..

If I carve out some space out in the living room area, then at least I will have the view from a sliding door to remind me of the world outside.

Mom showed up today with no warning, which is fine, i took the anxiety spike and turned it into clean dishes, so at least the dishes are done.

I have to sleep. this whole get the kids to school and then pass out again for four hours is really not a great routine.



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