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1:19 p.m. - 2020-03-25
Gleipnir by SKÁLD
Training during this pandemic thing is a little pointless. We arent doing any of the normal procedures at all, so, it's all well and good to get someone to ride around in a car and huck packages onto front porches but he's not going to know anything once this goes back to normal and I'm going to have to retrain him all over again.

If I could handle full time hours I would just fucking tell them I'll work all the part time shifts... but i cant. They've got me working every day for the next 12 days anyway, not full days the whole time, but training the whole time I think? Which is just fucking exhausting.

Ive gotta make some kind of small talk with a dude I have very fucking little in common with. ALSO I don't talk to anyone on a regular basis (except C) and I've already overshared with this dude and we've only done ONE 4 hour shift.

fucking whoops.

Had a chat with the surgeon this morning, as he works out of the hospital and good fucking god do not go near a hospital right now. The air itself is a coiled spring just... waiting. It's like walking through gel, it's awful.

anyway, he said any elective surgeries are postponed (yes indeed, Ive hyperfocused on news so much in the last week, i knew that already) but that if I don't hear from his office in two months to give them a call. Also, if I spike a fever and also have a pain episode then I should go to Emerg. Also if my skin turns yellow or the whites of my eyes turn yellow then off to the hospital (because jaundice leads to liver failure).

So that's another thing to worry about. I have been taking my temp basically whenever my panic rises and I just have to convince myself that im okay, it's okay, see? temp in the normal range, calm the fuck down.

I've made a terrible habit of reading the updates before bed, but I think maybe I should switch to reading them in the morning. And keep a bedtime routine of completely forgetting this whole situation exists, while trying to get a decent amount of sleep.

Im tasking the kids to help me with chores today and tomorrow, little bits, with lots of breaks.Because I cant handle standing for too long and I dont want them to feel like I'm just handing them a bunch of chores without showing them how to do them or being there for them for their questions and things.

Ive got a couple more ideas for homeschooling. Havent checked the school boards website yet, that's for next week. Im working all weekend, and training all weekend? I dunno, whatever, but it means I have to not take on too much before that or I will crash or be a complete asshole to the new guy, and I dont want to be in a shitty mood at work.

My period has taken almost everything out of me this week. My hands are starting to chap rom the sani, so washing dishes is stingy

I have a big painful bruise on my hip from where I fell last week at work. I tripped over someone's shoe when she decided to randomly step backwards. I forget that most people arent hyper vigilant about where other people are in comparison to where they are, and it's gotten me stepped on and checked, and tripped, more times than i can count. I just.. how do you not know there is someone behind you? How do you not see them out of the corner of your eye and adjust so you arent moving into their path? I dont get it.

Social distancing is amazing at the grocery store. I have an excuse for not coming anywhere near people. 6ft is a wonderful distance for strangers. There's no small talk at the register, it's lovely.

I'm still looking for toilet paper though. I don't want to buy the stuff at work but i'll go in early today so i can get some and throw it in my car before my shift. it's just a pain because the doors to the store are locked now, so i'll have to wait for someone to let me in, and let me out, and let me back in again.
We are still open, we are just forcing people to acknowledge the social distancing signs and the 'do you have a fever?' ' do you have a new cough or shortness of breath?' 'have you been outside the country in the last two weeks?' 'has any one you are in close contact with been out of the country during the last two weeks?'
And if the answer is yes to any of those, they are not allowed in to the store, they are told to call the store and we will figure out how to help them.
The decrease in foot traffic is the only way we are keeping up with the cleaning schedule. Every hour, everything touched by more than one person is cleaned and disinfected. everything in the whole store. all countertops, all buttons, handrails, the bathrooms, fucking everywhere. It's a lot.

Ive seen three people in my community wearing face masks, I'm keeping track, for something to do. Also because I've seen so many pictures of it but havent seen hardly any of it in my own town.

This si the first shift I'm working after the 'essentials only' decree by the provincial government, Im curious to see how much that decreases cars everywhere, or what changes are noticable. After looking at the list, im thinking not much will really change.

Just wish i could observe in peace and quiet and not have to entertain this kid in my car for 4 hours. I hope he went to service ontario yesterday, i was supposed to remind him (because, again, 19 yr old child) about it but i forgot before he had already disappeared into his car and driven away.

We are trying to do cashless deliveries as much as possible. and by the end of the shift dude didn't want to touch the cash at all. I mean okay, but unless you lick your fingers or rub your eyes or something... its just as dirty as money always is ? One of the fulltime guys was apparently 'washing' the money in hand sanitizer and 'drying' it with lysol wipes. Seems pretty excessive to me when you arent an at risk person.

But, I'm also asking my landlords if I can email them the rent money for this month instead of getting out a bunch of money from the bank. It's always seemed weird that I just pull out money for them to take it and deposit it right away in their bank.

I still havent completed by Annual Review Package, my cra account is locked and every time i try to call the system rings a few times then eiether a busy signal or simply disconnects. I dunno if Im going to be able to get on to the CRA account and print supporting documents off or not. So I'll keep trying to call, and if it doesnt work before the Mar 31st deadline, I'll complete the package and promise the supporting docs as soon as I can get my account unlocked. That will have to be enough for them.

Alright i should go tackle another sink full of dishes. and maybe drink more coffee. Try to calm my racing mind.



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