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8:13 a.m. - 2020-05-19
mbmbam is making me laugh, but ive got their voices in my head all the time now
I've been having a recurring dream for the last few nights. But it's not like the same dream over and over again. My brain decides to tell me this multipart story about this random gorgeous dude falling head over heels in love with me. And it's a different dude every time, but it's always a multinight dream and we always live sort of happily ever after.

And in the dreams there's an entire part where he has to explain to me why he was with me because I wasn't taking him seriously. That part runs different, sometimes im really mean, othertime I'm just like oh okay seems legit when he basically says "Because I want to be with you :)"

Brain's are so weird. I have this dream a few times a year, it lasts for a bunch of nights, sometimes only one or two, but sometimes (like this time) it's three or more.

It's like rewatching a movie, but your brain has stuck you in it, and you don't really know what's going to happen this time but you know there will be a happy ending.

At least so far it's been happy. Dont really want to think about a bad ending to this particular dream.

Woke up to my calf muscle trying to charliehorse, so now I'm being careful not to point my toes. And I've drank a bunch of water, because i was told as a kid charliehorses are caused by dehydration. but ive never looked that up so maybe i should do that

i dont work today, yesterday it rained the whole day but i managed to stay relatively dry. And only one stupidity, a dude got all up in my bubble in order to let himself into the building (not saying excuse me or anything so I didnt know what was happening, he just kept getting closer and closer to me, almost pinning me into a corner of the vestibule) and then demanded to know if I had buzzed the person down from their apartment because I was "not allowed in the building, for any reason!!!"

Dude wasnt even wearing a mask and I wanted to be like, if you actually cared about the other residents here, you'd be wearing a mask instead of just yelling at delivery drivers who are clearly waiting for someone to come get their package.....

Then, when he went inside, he pulled a chair around the corner from me and was talking to someone else, who also wasn't wearing a mask, about how they needed to be vigilant about keeping "riffraff" from getting in the building.

And it suddenly occured to me that if I had different skin, this job would be a whole different fucking circus. Like it's wonky enough just being a woman and having to correct people (Nono I deliver, I'm not one of the assistants. I don't have the knowledge to tell you the dosage of that. No, I dont work in the Dispensary, Yes I am a Lady Driver, I drive while being a lady every single day)

So just another reason to tip the shit out of delivery people. Always, no matter what.



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